Good Girl

“It was my fifth birthday. I was wearing my purple polka dot swimsuit.”

-------------------------

“I’ll take your sister’s clothes to her. Get dressed. Keep quiet.”

I sat there for what seemed like ever. Just staring. There was blood on my legs. All over my legs. I began to shake. I tried to stop, but that only seemed to make it worse. I touched my stomach, confused. Why did he hurt me? Had I done something bad? Had I gotten in trouble? Mama spanked me when I got in trouble. Was this His way? I didn’t like it.

I rubbed my stomach again. Would there be a bruise? I hoped not. Bruises were ugly. It was red.

I peeked out the door. I didn’t want anyone to see me crying. Or the blood now dried to me like a second pair of clothes. I pattered down the hall to the bathroom. But something was wrong. My legs wouldn’t close. They wouldn’t walk normal. It hurt to close them. It even hurt to move at all. It felt like someone had replaced my legs with a big bowl of jelly. I looked down just to check that they were still my legs. Hoping they had been replaced, because that would make this a bad dream. But they weren’t. They were still my legs. I poked them, just to be extra sure. Still legs. I cried at that, too.

I tried to clean myself up but failed miserably. Some time later, He came back in. He gently lifted me to the counter and cleaned me up fully all the while telling me he loved me and he was sorry but I had done that to myself. I tried to ask why, but he covered my mouth again, causing a sick feeling in my tummy. When he had finished cleaning all the gross stuff and the blood off me, he playfully smacked my rear and sent me to my room to change.